I heard that the vasectomy is not nearly fool-proof, can be extremely painful and can take a looong time to heal. As a woman, considering this and having asked my doctors, I’ll be going for the tubal.

Amazing how they managed to sink any ships that way...

Black don’t crack but yellow stays mellow...?

I said Patrick but I have no Patrick. Lies!

But mr Depp, that did not work out well for you...

Taylor Swift, is that you?

I just looked at the first one and said 'ooh hello...ki' and snorted

If you spill any more beans, consider yourself toast.

I own it, buy it off me because I'm broke and have no enemies left.

Look for Sofadogs on FB, they are very funny

I have been Belgian for 35 years, we do not have blue waffles, we only have waffle waffles. This must be those druggie Dutchmen next door...

Latino Bama

There's a jobcentre around here that has a huge Steve Jobs quote on their window. It really irks me because SJ was not a good boss, he was terrifying.

This took him 6 years and 720.000 tries!

Wrong neighbourhood Motherducker...

I looked at his ears and thought 'vulcan'...

We're not in a war zone, obviously it's going to create more of a buzz. Why do you think they even chose Paris?

Do they look exáctly the same? They do, don't they, they look exactly the same.