Ash

cakelover


Never take what I say seriously. Including this.
- [email protected]

— Ash Report User
What are some of the greatest laws in your country? 29 comments
cakelover · 18 hours ago
Apparently in a town near me called Chester you can shoot a Welshman with a bow and arrow
3
What a time to be alive 2 comments
cakelover · 18 hours ago
'Straya
1
Greetings from Austin, TX (Also first selfie) 74 comments
cakelover · 1 day ago
Damn right
1
God has a sense of humor at least 9 comments
cakelover · 2 days ago
What isn't?
1
I always felt he was something else 4 comments
cakelover · 2 days ago
Did you just assume his species?
18
Someone report a glitch in the matrix 4 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Yeah, we can't because it damages our eyes. However, birbs live only a short time, not long enough for damage to be done
13
Swiggity swooty 12 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
This is quite amusing
Someone report a glitch in the matrix 4 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
I'm boring enough to know that's a bird of prey, hovering because it has spotted the ultraviolet markings of a prey animal's urine
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What marcus? 5 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
You could say his life is "crumbing" apart
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What marcus? 5 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
And another one...
2
Alright, sorry 1 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Even milk won't flirt with me
Sigh
4
Swiggity swooty 12 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Swiggity swambi, I'm comin' for dat bambi
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Cute af 13 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
@peachypersimmon
This is like you in bottle form :)
8
Found the problem 15 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Clear the floor, I'ma spit some bars here
.
Yuki my man, or Jordan as he's known
Has just recently moved into his new home
But he's got a bit of a problem with his appearance
His self-confidence has gone on the clearance
But this guy doesn't seem to see what we do
He's a man that we all look up to
He's a much better fighter than I'm a songwriter
Made of tough stuff, spends his time getting buff
.
I hear he's been working on those obliques
He'll be looking even more on fleek
This guy speaks fluent French, the language of love
Not only is he hench, he can coo like a dove
So ladies gather round, he's the fittest guy in town
Don't ever let him put himself down
Listen up Yuki, you're my Funsubstance bruvva
Take it from me, in this place we all luv ya
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Found the problem 15 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
It certainly is
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Found the problem 15 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Yuki, the whole of Funsubstance thinks you're a cute little croissant, so stop this right now
3
Bad science jokes 7 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Oh yeah, good old hydrogen peroxide
Thanks buddy
I'm off to drown myself now
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Bad science jokes 7 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
I feel daft, because I love science.
But I don't get this joke
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How to use 15 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Um, I've been a bad cake
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How to use 15 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
This is one cake that doesn't get soggy when wet
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How to use 15 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
*whistles and holds up three fingers*
I volunteer as tribute
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Look closely 7 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Congratulations
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Look closely 7 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
There is a guy who appears to be naked
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Guys who only do push ups and sit ups 8 comments
cakelover · 3 days ago
Maybe, if taken to the extreme I guess. I don't think there's much danger of that happening to the vast majority of peeps
2