To bad Costco's toilet paper sucks

They just shut the one down I used to go to as a kid, even took all my nephews and nieces there. :(

I think you were a dog in a past life

You should never say anything out loud because then you can claim insanity. If you talk about it it will be premeditated.

Go to the bar get drunk dance with any girl you can

I'm no expert but I think DOT would require a oversized load permit and signage.

My grandmother worked in a meat packing plant making hot dogs, she always told us they were made of chicken lips and butt holes.

I bet you they still don't have enough lanes open for check-out.

Tan O.J.

I'll burn that bridge when I get to it.

I'm glad to see the horse dump her.

I'm an idiot, who is this?

MASH

Thought it was funny that all the chest codes were Monty Python: search for the Holy Grail references.

Quasimodo was busy cooking meth ;)

As a former Mall security guard I can confirm this.

It's true everyone Wyoming does not exist so stay away. ;)

Would tell this joke all the time!

My dad pretends to pick his nose with his

My band teacher always said "Strong and wrong".

I think they should reanimate old Disney movies with the computer animation and stop with the live action.

I still buy Legos for myself when I feel like adulthood is coming on to strong.