So you want her to have someone “good.”
Ok. Do you trust her judgment? If you trust her judgment- then why try to make the choice for her? Asking her out just gives her a choice. If you really aren’t “good enough” then she will reject you right? If you do not trust her judgment- you are still trying to make the choice for her- but you can control if YOU ask her out- but not an ever worse someone else. What you CAN control though- is if she says yes you can do all you can to be a better person that you feel she deserves.
But here is the kicker- the one we didn’t cover. If you trust her judgment, and ask her out, and she says “yes,” then either YOU misjudged yourself and you ARE “good enough for her,” or- you were wrong and she has poor judgment. If she has poor judgment- the odds she would ask out someone else who is “as bad” or “worse” but wouldn’t care enough to try to be better are high. Therefore- if your intent is to “protect” her- we will keep arriving back at the conclusion that it is better (in “protected logic”) to ask her out.
CONCLUSION: You aren’t actually avoiding asking her out because you think she deserves better. You’re not asking her out because you think you aren’t good enough for her and she will reject you. Instead of either facing rejection or admitting your feelings of inadequacy you’ve constructed a logical fallacy that makes you a self sacrificing hero who by virtue of your selflessness is better than any guy she rejects. It’s not for her benefit but for your own that you aren’t asking her out.
There is also the fear that if she said yes- you’d have to live up to this ideal you’ve crafted. You’d actually have to try, to “live up,” and grow and such. That’s all hard work which you may not believe you can do, or you may just be unwilling to do. But saying “I don’t want to try to be a good partner..” or “I don’t think I have a shot” tend to reflect badly on you. So if you frame it as for her benefit and ignore the fact she can make good decisions- and is entitled to make “poor” ones if she chooses- and get to feel heroic for it.
Sometimes we feel like we aren’t good enough and don’t ask the guy out either. We should all try and take that step cause you could be missing out on an amazing relationship. If your crush didn’t reciprocate you could’ve still had a fulfilling relationship but that’s up to you to decide cause apparently the friend zone is such a shit place. But if I liked someone that much I’d rather be their friend than not in their life at all. So go ask your crush out today! :D
Ok. Do you trust her judgment? If you trust her judgment- then why try to make the choice for her? Asking her out just gives her a choice. If you really aren’t “good enough” then she will reject you right? If you do not trust her judgment- you are still trying to make the choice for her- but you can control if YOU ask her out- but not an ever worse someone else. What you CAN control though- is if she says yes you can do all you can to be a better person that you feel she deserves.