Perfect timing. Thank you murderer

That’s the divide between the overly harsh and the “bleeding heart” that quite often neither seems to be able bridge and reconcile. We aren’t responsible for the circumstances of our birth- and everything that comes after that is in part influenced by our birth. BUT- whatever circumstances we find ourselves in at a given moment in our lives IS literally the product of our choices within the bounds of circumstances we have. Now- we are all bound by certain things near as we know. Biology and physics aren’t documented to change based on much we can do. We can work within them, possibly manipulate them- but we can’t really change them as far as we know.

So the harsh person would say- any bad that can happen to us is the product of choices and inevitable circumstances that are simply inherent to our reality. We could also say that whatever happens to us is simply one event in a chain started by the choices of others made before we were born. I don’t think either is the whole truth. One speaks to an idea of absolute control over our lives- a comfort to the insecure; and the other implies a destiny we cannot really move- things happen and we can’t be blamed. As you say- it’s all based on details and context. We can be humanists and say: no one can fully predict all the ripples of any action over the course of their lives. That the circumstances of our birth can create challenges and limit the choices we have- thus limiting the possibilities open to us.