Tumblr is a weird and magical place

This is one of the greatest puns I've ever witnessed

Someone confirm

The cat just walks away like "Well shit...I'll just be on my way then."

Well I'll probably already be on my phone at 3 am, so I'll just put it in my pocket, and take the gun. Boom, I have both.

And how does he not have an Oscar?

He actually looks kinda creepy

I was eating fruit
But now im not

In Australia, I don't see a day pass where I haven't heard someone say it.

YES

"The 'your mom' jokes tended to be surprisingly accurate in most cases"
That's hilarious XD

I smell like spaghetti

I throw my spanish in the air sometimes
Saying "I DON'T EVEN SPEAK SPANISH WHY AM I HERE?"

That fact about him talking and sharing cake with fans is so sweet

Mind blown

I was trying to find where the steps were for like 5 minutes

My brain is hurting

Because last time I tried to fly, my wings got me stuck in a tree and I had to cut them off.

Calligraphy: make any sentence majestic.

This is amazing

If only it was cat-proof