the_average_gatsby comments

the_average_gatsby

Likes: music, wrenching, booze, and using my considerable catalogue of traumas to make deeply upsetting black comedy

— The_average_Gatsby

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If more stores had this policy, retail employees would be happier 4 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Me?

RIP speed hamster 4 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

I like to think I'm not a horrible person, but that made me laugh harder than I'd like

Anyone get it? 10 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Where beer does flow and men chunder?

@brainyrs 8 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Yeah I was gonna say why's the gadsden flag always used as a white supremacist thing in comics? Otherwise very wholesome

This made me laugh for a few minutes! 2 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

The Boomba

Oh no, not Florida Man 5 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

In his Florida van

None shall escape 7 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

T H E O B E L I S K

Mental illness is pretty 16 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

I'm in this picture and I dont like it

We don't talk much about the goose 11 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Since this was apparently posted by the Nebraska HS, and I myself am a resident of the best state that colorado won't stop fucking up, I'll take it upon myself to break down our resident fauna
Raccoons- cute trash diggers who can't stay off the road to save their own skin (literally)
Possums- clean friends who eat ticks, but have the same problem as the raccoons in that they are irredeemably attracted to highways
Squirrels- tree dwelling crack fiends who absolutely will drop shit on your car
Owls- benign yard decorations, will control rodents and provide ambiance
Geese- Geese
Deer- delicious highway kamikazes

...All around him are familiar faces 3 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Fantastic

Lowest effective dose (led) 6 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

The problem around here is guys mounting trail lights on their brushbangers and wiring them directly into the fucking headlight switch

Are you ready to be sad? I sure wasn't 15 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

As the caretaker of two raggedy black shelter cats I felt the same way

Are you ready to be sad? I sure wasn't 15 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Also people who swerve to hit animals should be hanged. Just sayin'

I love this format 1 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

I mean considering how low the bar was in regards to being institutionalized, it's definitely plausible

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Now that's a deck I'd like to sit on

Praise these doctors 12 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

That's what severe acid burns look like

Good for him 4 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

The original article says he fell backwards onto a PTO shaft

If you don't understand this, we can't be friends 9 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

Sadly yes...But he lived!

Nothing about the process is easy, and hasn't been for decades 27 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

@guest_ @lordhab yeah I guess now that I think of it the only reason it seems like a hassle to me is because my county is rural as shit and everything is done in hard copy. There is a waiting period though unless you go to the sheriff's office and get it done beforehand

2 · Edited 4 years ago

Dog time 1 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

That's an excellent dog

Use bing Not google 1 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

As bad as the nazis are, the G4 is an objectively bad ass buggy. A 6 wheeled, straight 8 powered off road touring car I mean come on

A woman in Wiesbaden (Germany) used the wrong fuel for her car and tried to remove it 4 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago

With a wet/dry vac probably

This is true 6 comments

the_average_gatsby · 4 years ago