Pffft, yeh right ... and get barricaded in the dunny by a Jaguar. No thanks.

Only whilst one promenades.

It will depend on your location, local parasites/threats, your dog's age and your dog's health.
I don't know if you've taken your furry little mate to the vet at all but it may be worth the time for a check up and professional advice. Take a notepad and ask questions.
You can use it as a fact finding mission for further research or you may have enough confidence in their advice to decide if any medication is required.

If only they had access to some sort of ceramic, water holding device...

I knew exactly what you were saying, I wasn't born in the wagon of a travelling show.
I just thought rewording "I can feel something inside me say, I really don't think you're strong enough" might have been more amusing (and still give a nod to your original word play) :-)

Hmm, I have a suspicion you lack the strength for that.

Nailed it.

I once saw a frog burp but that is easily more stupid.
(mind you it could have just been croaking)

I think it's a horndog.