What should I do..?
by pbachman21 · 17 comments 14 weeks ago
pbachman21 · 14 weeks ago
What should I do?
So, I don't think my family is very open minded to other religions or new things in this new generation. I will occasionally ask my mom what her thoughts are on lesbians and gays and she will say, "Well, I think they have a right to their opinion but that's not the way we were meant to be" and then I would ask her what she would think if someone in our family came out. She said, "I will still love them no matter what." I asked her, "would you treat them any differently?" She said, "no, of course not."
But then when there may be a gay couple on a TV show then she will skip through it or pause it or everyone watching in my family will say, "OH UGH EWW WE DONT NEED TO SEE THAT!" But I sit there. Quietly. And I will try to make them see that those two are in love and that "you wouldn't want your right taken away so why take theirs?!" They will then respond in a stupid way with average answers like, "but it's not natural!" "It's not the godly way!"
pbachman21 · 14 weeks ago
Now, don't judge me based off my family, I love them dearly. And if someone comes out then I would be so proud of them for doing that and I will support them in any way they need. I'm not for it but I'm not against it. I am straight. I wouldn't want my rights taken away, so why would we take yours.
My mother also will say things like, "They were trying to give me parenting advice! Seriously, one of your kids is gay, and you want to give me parenting advice?" She didn't say this to the mans face, she said it at home to me after I asked her randomly what was the stupidest parenting advice you've ever gotten. My sister will say it's not natural and she will side with my mom on most of those things. But I'm not sure what I should do, I want to open their minds and to show them that they are happy with themselves and they are in love, but it's just me against 4 other people.
pbachman21 · 14 weeks ago
And they are all hard to argue with because I'm the youngest and I've got some issues where things come out the wrong way 75% of the time so I prefer to stay quiet. It's basically if you could hear dyslexia. It looks a right way in your brain but your mouth twists it when you talk to fast. But anyways, that's besides the point. How should I go about them opening up their minds and showing them that those people aren't any less human than you for loving the same sex?
rosoo · 14 weeks ago
Of you have one, get a gay friend and his boyfriend, and bring them over. Try to get your parents to realize that these people are truly happy and hopefully change their mind
sublimegamer · 14 weeks ago
As a christian who hates gayness and lesbianism (I still love the people who commit these sins), my view is that loving another person is ok in the sense of friendship and comradery, but an intimate relationship involving romance and sex between the same gender is not God's will (God called it an abomination), regardless of what people may feel (the desires of the flesh).
awake_ash · 14 weeks ago
Oh, the narrow minded religious people, gotta love em
dr_richard_ew · 14 weeks ago
I heard my name somewhere, I gotta leave my mark
*sticks flag into the ground*
Now in all seriousness I think rosoo has the right idea here
mickymouse · 14 weeks ago
Just do and live how you want to live. It’s not up to you to try and force an opinion on someone. If they come round to it, it’ll be when they’re ready to accept people for who they are.
The only thing I will say, on a slightly different note, never EVER be afraid to voice your opinion whether your friends/family/others agree or not. This doesn’t have to mean LGBT based stuff either, and it doesn’t mean you should be trying to change someone’s mind. But you should be proud of what you think and believe in
unicycle · 14 weeks ago
Maybe you could try to find a show/movie about where the main character slowly discovers that they're gay? That way your family could see them as a person and identify with them first, and maybe come to see other sexualities as more natural. In the end though, you really can't force anyone to change their minds unless they want to change.
parisqeen · 14 weeks ago
Personally, I think it's ridiculous people base their entire thought process and being off religion, however it's their choice. Your family is allowed to think and act how they want but when it comes to the love of two people, I think it's stupid to say it's wrong because of some words in a book (I know, this could be insensitive but I grew up in a Christian community and I wasn't fond of being told how or what to think, especially about others). I agree with Micky that you should just live and think how you wish. I think sometimes it's nice to ask people why they think things, always ALWAYS question yourself too and ask why do I believe this? Help your family understand that you think it's totally fine for anyone to love anyone, voice this next time they do some of those things you talked about, let them know that not everyone who is religious thinks being LGBT+ is wrong. Don't force it on them though, they are their own people and sometimes you can't change how people think.
peachypersimmon · 14 weeks ago
Sometimes you can't change the way people think and you just have to let them get on. For example my husband (of whom I've been with for 10 years and love dearly) is a huge homophobe and I HATE that about him especially as I'm bi. He knows this and still spews out homophobic bile to me. I've tried talking with him rationally, we've got into arguments and after a while we decided that certain subjects (homosexuality, Islam and Trump) are not up for discussion and we refrain from talking about them. Even in passing. You can love someone or people very much and still hate things about them.
peachypersimmon · 14 weeks ago
With my family I never came out as bi because:
A) they'd give me a verbal thrashing
B) I'd be the butt of jokes for forever
C) it's none of their business.
dancadamorte · 14 weeks ago
Like others said, sometimes there's not much you can do about casual prejudice. I'm not sure how old you are or how much longer you'll be living at home, but as you get older one way to push back gently is to stop responding. For instance, whenever you hear something bad about a group of people from your family, don't answer and don't engage. If you're asked for a response, shrug and ask "what do you want me to say?" This doesn't change their thoughts, but over time can lessen how often they bother to say it to you. It also lets you make a non-confrontational stance. It lets them know you won't talk badly about people without picking a fight.
sheeby78 · 14 weeks ago
a major pint made at a church in my neighborhood is that yes being gay is a sin but just like how gluttony is a sin or vulgarity, what the priests were saying is that everyone sins and that's fine someone who's gay is as sinful as someone who curses. This is something that made me more comfortable going to church as someone who is bi.
pbachman21 · 14 weeks ago
Ya, it does help put a bit of perspective on things
flyingoctopus · 14 weeks ago
Apparently God says Shrimp is a sin more times than homosexuality. So if they eat seafood then hit them with that.
sheeby78 · 14 weeks ago
http://www.godhatesshrimp.com This website was made as a response to the god hates fags movement, it's pretty funny and apparently biblically accurate.