Greeeeaaaat it's not like I have any other shit to worry about :(
(Note: No I'm not trying to be rude to OP, and I'm sorry if you took it that way)

Are you Jeff Goldblum by chance?

Now you're speaking my language!

Zippidy doo daa!

Either that or the person driving the gondola took some nyquil and red bull together

I once actually read a porn story at someone wrote where the main actor actually got murdered in the end. I went from enjoying myself to feeling like shit in a matter of seconds

Try dribbling a football

What stupid 12 year old would admit to their parents that they know what Brazzers is. If I ever did that at my age my parent's would've murdered me

Sounds like somebody cut the cheese

One life ends, but another begins anew

I'm sold