At least our first contact with aliens won't be a shitshow (for context, Stephen Hawking often said that contact with aliens would be like Christoper Columbus' first contact with native americans. He said they'd either conquer us or accidentally kill us with alien bacteria. I remember him also saying he would offer bounties for killing aliens)
Send help, my key is broken. I need it ixed right ucking now, aggots. I broke it paying respects to our allen leader, Stephen Hawkings. I will pay ive bucks to whoever ixes it.
Stephen Hawking dies on pi day