Pokethebear

pokethebear


“I am exactly what they say I am
I stand for everything that they can't stand
I can't help it I was born this way
But when I'm gone you'll remember my name”

— Pokethebear Report User
Pink waterfalls 11 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
You have to check your engine compartment for your neighbor’s cat before you start it on cold days.
3
What a Wonderful World 6 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Except that the UK has found a way to criminalize speech. There’s no more hope for them.
8
What 10k horsepower on a drag racing tire looks like 3 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
What’s the warranty on that tire?
2
Chin fetish 13 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Like a role playing game where she is tied up naked and shoved in the trunk of your car and you have to meet your dealer, Jesse, who heard noises in your trunk and thinks you’re a cop and he pulls a gun but you get the drop on him and club him with a snow brush and throw his corpulent unconscious body in the back seat and race toward the hospital so you wouldn’t be blamed if he was found in the Dollar General parking lot and robbed and murdered, then you get pulled over by the police because your girlfriend accidentally unplugged a taillight with her foot when you crossed the railroad tracks too fast now you’re sitting quietly in the driver’s seat with both hands on the wheel while the SWAT team is screaming to put your hands out the window because the cop thought you had a kidnap victim in the trunk and a corpse in the back seat while you contemplate ending it all by rapidly reaching for your snow brush.
.
Maybe staying home and beating off to pics of double chins is a safer plan.
7
Or how SJW's shower 6 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Quiet you bigot
6
Never thought he would see this day 5 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Ha. I thought the point was they could afford to fill the tank all the way.
3
You never say no to this man 25 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
I should build a ramp
1
Meet alica schmidt, a german runner that dubbed the 'sexiest athlete' 14 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Maybe if I buy myself a pair of those running shorts I can shave a few minutes off of my 5K time.
4
When life gives you lemons 3 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
When I woke up I decided that it was a bad idea, but tried once more just to be certain.
3
Chin fetish 13 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Everybody has their own kink
12
New kind of bear 5 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Body condom.
12
Scale 17 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Don’t tell him. Leave him and his obese mountain lion guessing.
26
Found the engineer 1 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Hands off, this is nacho hat!
1
Be careful what you wish for 6 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
The charecter, Brita, is a cause of the day reactionary activist. They typically don’t think anything through.
3
When was the last time 3 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
How was I summoned here?
Confusing the enemy 5 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
I haven’t seen much from him lately.
8
If he were alive 13 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
With a Patriot Guard Riders flag
1
If he were alive 13 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
Dukes of Hazzard was my favorite show! They did’t ruin the charger, they caused a resurgence.
3
If he were alive 13 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
A Jeep Patriot and a Ram Rebel. (As much as I dislike Fiat/Chrysler they have the names)
Me Avoiding responsibilities 3 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
What movie?
Grand prize winner! 11 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
They didn’t specify for who’s life.
6
Louis the Gorilla prefers to walk upright 8 comments
pokethebear · 6 years ago
He somehow reminds me of Stewie Griffin.