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When your turtles don't share their pizza with you 18 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

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Old but gold 10 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

6. Try to maintain your cool while being convicted of a sex crime

So turned on 7 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

So is this moth/lamp phenomenon happening everywhere, or just on FS?

Damn cat, you lose 6 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

I think my phobia is quite valid. Do not shame me, for that would be felineosexualophobiaphobic.

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Damn cat, you lose 6 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Why is your cat fucking you?

Probably 'murica 23 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Yeah, Reductress is a satirical website

Women 4 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Confused me for a sec cause ass and fanny are the same thing where I come from.

Some words to live by 16 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

$22 an hour? What company? My factory job pays $14/hour and it fucking kills me.

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Crystal mill 1 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Ah yes, in Windhelm.

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Who else measure their hole? 4 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Afshin?? Is that a name?

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Some words to live by 16 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Yeah. I regret being good at my job now. They keep me late every day while sending home people who aren’t able to keep up as much.

Interesting title 5 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

I was totally also thinking of South Park when I commented

"Wine makes you live longer" 7 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Well yeah, if you spend all your money on the horse...

I guess he is both 6 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Or a thief

Interesting title 5 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Fukka Uden

Would you hit this button? 15 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

It’s my only chance to be a turtle, why wouldn’t I push the button?

Mönch 6 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Is everyone just here to ruin the joke?

Mönch 6 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

All cats love pancakes.

Saving brother 3 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

That’s one tiny ass cat

Practicing for Darwin awards 9 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

I feel like I’ve seen you talking about this specific explosive multiple times now...

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Actually I think they’re 18 10 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

I thought that was a joke for a second then I had to do the math

Practicing for Darwin awards 9 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Uh, is he dead? If so, give that man the award!

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Good guy Chili's 3 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

I would take this to the nearest chili’s and tell the manager they’ve been replaced.

Ukrainian police 4 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

Dur, oops

What's worse than a heart break 14 comments

alekazam · 5 years ago

When?