Oh ok I got a wire crossed along the way lol

That's all right. The nieghborhood that I grew up in has cleaned up a lot. When I was a kid around 10, I could buy weed within a block in any direction from at least 8 different houses. Angle Dust heroine , mescaline , acid ,coke ,hash, you name it. I was actually held down and forced to smoke weed by my older brothers and their friends. They thought it was funny, until they realized I liked it and started stealing their weed.lol. Assholes, but I still love them. Yeah I quit everything by the time I was twenty.

@pripyatplatypus I don't have a therapist. I don't feel like what I have is severe enough that I need to go. It's not getting in the way of work or family life, rather it gets in the way of a good social life and the starting of new projects (which makes me more depressed and less likely to start socializing or doing new projects, both of which would surely help).
@alekazam I have a religious objection to marijuana. Like nicengelman, I'm not a prude about it, more like Jews not eating pork. I'm trying to exercise more than just walking, but I struggle to keep the habit, so it's not my go to either.
@karlboll I live in a very mountainous area, so I'll try some hiking. I haven't done that in a while, and I'm sure it would do me some good. I'll check out the YT channel too.
@awake_ash I get that. Do you feel like "this isn't incapacitating me, so I don't want to burden someone else with it"?

@popsy Thanks! question: how do you get yourself to eat right and exercise when you have zero motvation to eat right and exercise?
@alekazam Re: Where does it stem from? I have a family history of depression and anxiety on both sides, so there's a genetic component I'll never get away from. Outside of that, looking at factors that are different in my life compared to times when I haven't felt depression—I'm working full-time, odd hours; I'm not in school and have no non-work goals to look forward to or work towards (and the depression makes setting and working towards those goals overwhelming); since graduating college, getting married, having kids, and moving, I've lost all the friends I made in college, so it kinda feels like a big part of my life just went with them.

@nicengelman I hadn't thought about chatty videogames at all. I don't have any gaming stuff so if I play anything, it's apps on my phone or single player puzzle/strategy games. Hadn't thought that those might be further isolating me, but they might. If I ever get a console or a decent PC, I'll try some chatty games, thanks
@typow777 I'll try some nature walks, karlboll suggested that too

@unklethan I'm not sure what motivates you. You're in your twenties so your metabolism should be good. You could be just a bit down right now and maybe not depressed. I don't know what kind of work you do but I'm guessing you have an afternoon/night shift job. Working days might solve a lot of the down feelings . Getting your testosterone checked could help. For exercise , get a dog and walk it, plus dogs can help with depression just by petting them (if you like dogs). I hope it's just a phase. Make sure you reach out if it gets worse. Don't isolate, that compounds the depression. As far as diet, hah, get a woman to nag you into eating right. Lol. I have a sweet tooth and have to sneak any kind of my grandkids treats.

Therapy

@jensensbooty how informative

@alekazam thank you

@unklethan I’m in my late 20s with severe depression and social anxiety and while I might not be able to shed light on what would work for you I can tell you what works for me.
You could try therapy. I saw a psychologist who on day one thought my condition was so severe she sent me to a psychiatrist who tried to find the right mix of happy pills. Boy those were some “fun” times. I would wake up at night hallucinating floating chairs and the first day I had them I legit slept for 24 hours without so much as a meal. After a month I was basically a zombie and on my third set of drugs. I would sleep over ten hours per night and felt no better. I started living really recklessly like driving without looking and then I realized I’m not myself. I don’t feel depressed because I don’t feel anything but I might hurt myself or someone else. I HIGHLY DONT ADVICE THIS but I quit cold turkey. I was supposed to taper off the medicine but I felt so horrible I stopped my pills and stopped..

Seeing both the psychiatrist and psychologist. But if you end up seeing one please know that it may take time, you might not immediately feel better, it takes trial and error, it may be very difficult for some time. I tell you this because when I finally had the courage to get help I thought that the cogs were in place and now I was gonna be okay. But you should never lose sense of reality by that I don’t mean lose hope - but know that the road is tough. Or else when you’re weak and you try to get help and if it fails it’s gonna hit hard so you gotta know the reality and accept it okay? Now if you aren’t there yet that’s okay too.
The things that help me the absolute most is surprisingly having people to talk to. I used to seek that from friends but I’m terrible at being social because of severe anxiety. But on funsub I could be anyone. I can talk about anything and someone is always around heck I’m always around you can @ me anytime and tell me about your day no matter how mundane

It was. Okay? Never forget that we have your back :) people provide you with a distraction cause you know how your mind works right? The more you focus on something the more important it becomes and the affect it has on your life is greater. If you think about other things like new projects, new friends, things you saw on the road today whatever it is it fills up your mind and no matter how small a thought it stops you from thinking about how depressed you are because (I’m not being mean okay) no matter how much you think about it night and day THAT as in that thought process - it doesn’t do anything to help does it? Thinking about it won’t really help so filling up your mind with more helpful thoughts can. If you have family and friends you haven’t connected with in a while try that. Or if you’re like me then you might find that hike a lot more enjoyable. But fill your mind look at every rock listen to every sound

Which brings me to the only real good thing I got out of therapy - grounding. One of the best things for your depression is to live in the moment. It may seem simple or stupid but trust me, as someone who just started to see the little rays of light through the dark grounding and living in today and this moment really helped me. Especially cause I’m someone that worries about everything that happened in the past and might happen in the future. Not just when you hike but in your everyday life pay attention to how it feels to exist. The sights sounds and how your feet feel on the ground. Breathe slow and observe. There is nothing that keeps bad thoughts at bay like filling it with life. Your depression might be helped by a simple change in perspective. I would watch inspiring videos like Ted talks not necessarily about depression or anything related to it. But seeing anything that sparks an interest in you or let’s you see the world differently might help. Another exercise can be to

Think of someone you absolutely hate. Then humanize them. Might be super hard depending on who it is and what they did to have hurt you. But that’s about changing perspective too seeing a familiar problem in a different light. One more thing might be religion since you mentioned it. You can use your faith to find a bit of peace as well knowing that your fate doesn’t rest solely on you and that God will help you every step of the way and truly believing that could help you too. Sort of like the inspiring videos, I also love reading books. If you want a recommendation try “the subtle art of not giving a fuck” or “the last lecture” or even “Sophie’s world”..sorry for going on and on! I’ve struggled with this my entire life and while I still have my very bad days I feel like I’m slowly getting a handle on things and even if one single suggesting here helps you in anyway I would be extremely happy for you. Feel free to ask me anything regarding my suggestions and don’t worry you’ve got this

@kcat It sounds like they were a little too enthusiastic with your medication, not that it doesn't happen a lot. In my experience they started a little too low to see what I could handle and then over weeks and months increased it more and more. My treatment started off with hospitalization though which meant that every few hours they were testing every single thing it was possible to test, including blood tests, and I was kept on what they call a "one to one" where they act like they aren't but there's always someone watching and taking notes. So, not everyone gets that treatment. Another thing for @unklethan to note is that most antidepressants take weeks to actually start changing your system and working the way they should. A lot of people become increasingly suicidal for the first few weeks of being on medication because they actually start to feel motivated or an increased sense of volition, which is almost funny in a way.

The truth about depression, like real, true depression, is that it takes time to treat it, and to be honest it never completely goes away if your condition isn't temporary, but you learn to handle it

@nicengelman I was too enthusiastic that’s what I’m trying to warn him about. I guess I should have mentioned a time frame - I was on my third mix and it had been months by the time I quit. I felt absolutely no emotion and barely felt alive at that point and the only thing that felt better was the random panic attacks which I can already control using grounding. But yes it’s definitely not simple and not gonna work say like a painkiller and that’s why I wanted to share my experience with him. And yes it doesn’t go away completely but what you’re aiming for is for you to be able to be able to find healthy ways to cope without it driving you to the edge. To not self harm, to not be reckless and to be able to function well enough to go to work or pursue other things without depression holding you back.

It's also important not to feel guilty about it. A lot of people end up in a cycle of feeling bad for feeling bad, I always equate it to this: Trying not to feel bad because other people have it worse is like not smiling because other people have it better. We don't have manual control over our emotions, they're ephemeral in their nature and you can learn to live with them. But you have to be honest. @kcat makes a lot of good points.

I don’t say it enough but you guys especially you @nicengelman with your hilarious comments, really have helped me through so much <3 you’ve made me realize that just like how you can be so lonely while with a loved one you could also feel so connected while around complete strangers

@kcat Ditto!