This french horn seems out of tune

It's just a little scratch, it's fine!

One year a freshman mellophone player was on homecoming court. We march into the pep assembly, put our instruments behind the bleachers, and take them back out for the parade. This girl was riding in a car because she was on court, and left her mellophone in the bleachers. The bleachers get closed back, plus one mellophone, and everyone thinks it has been stolen. Fast forward two months, and they open the bleachers for a basketball game, only to discover the mellophone. (The resemblance is uncanny, this is what inspires me to tell such a long story.) the girl is fined $600 in repairs and long story short she's not in band anymore.

oh the horror!!! that poor french horn!!!

Have you tried turning it off and on again

As a passionate French Horn player, this made me cry a little bit.

I play French horn and it is a beautiful instrument. WHY THE FUCKING HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT TO A LOVELY INSTRUMENT SUCH AS THIS ONE?!

Look a twirly trumpet