Ebola? Ebola?

Okay, you know what? Time to clear shit up. Yes, Ebola is a mostly deadly disease. The death rate is 47%. But Ebola currently has a tiny area of effect; a small portion of West Africa. Because people are idiots, they'll help out in Africa, return to America and then refuse to go into isolation to prevent Ebola from spreading if they do have it. Nevertheless, there have so far been about 6 cases of Ebola in America. That means you have a 1 in 50 million chance of meeting someone with Ebola. Also it is transmitted by fluids leaving one person and entering another by the eyes, mouth or nose. In short, this is my message to America: CALM. THE FUCK. DOWN. Thanks for reading.

So you just sit there and die in silence.

Me on stage last year, got the coughs during an important scene. Thank God I didn't have any lines