Home alone

lies you would have seen him behind you !!!11!!!11oneone

I wouldn't be calling 911, I'd be taking safety off my 1911

I have a Glock, 40cal.
He chose the wrong house.

I would die of a heart attack first.

Then you shit your pants. Then you realize the tv is on and that was the reflection

My mom would have taken the closest weapon and run outside stabbing. ....

And then you realize that you are the Murderer that is wanted.

"" you think this door is locked for my safty ? It was locked for ur safty , DIE MOTHER F****** "

At first I thought that YOU were the murdererererer.
Then I found fifty bucks!

*screaming*
Jesus its actually a man out there in the snow ;o
But I think its the garbage man.
But maybe the garbage man has a secret hobby...

"I'm not in danger, I am the danger"

Sounds like The Outsider of H. P. Lovecraft, no?

,,You're late.'' - I'd say as I'll be slowly turning around...

I'm the last person I would have expected

...Fuck you! Fuck. You!

Anyone else hear this on Cry's Cry reads playlist? the 911 Operator?

Wouldn't you see yourself in the reflexion first ?
So you would know he wasn't outside, no ?
I would probably shit myself, take a banana as protection then leave quietly but quickly.

and then a skeleton popped out it was a spoppi scelinton

I'd go "what's up bro wanna eat some pizza together before you kill me?"