Buy a Mac

Actually it's more like saying "I'm out of food, so I'm going to invest in a very expensive surgery to make myself able to photosynthesize." Sure, you'll never have that problem again, but if you have the money to buy a mac, you definitely have the money to buy some more time for your anti-virus software >:

Or, perhaps more correctly, you've run out of condoms so now you're only going to fuck a partner who has natural built in protection from viruses and will only get pregnant when you both agree to, making condoms entirly redundant.