Birthday milestones

This made me slightly depressed.

Actually ''because I'm old'' is a good excuse for everything
I.e
Grandson : grandpa why are you in Vegas with a trany in a swimming pool full of pie while people are jumping on a trampoline in the bushes screaming TGIF when it Monday, while its grandmas death anniversary..
Grandpa : because I'm fucking old.
Grandson : well don't forget to use protection we don't want another..''accident''

Old enough to drink in Canada: 18 or 19 (depending on province)

For 18 I would've put "being able to finally order Shamwow"

There is SO much wrong with this, not the least of which being SNL has been terrible my entire life. Your references are the least of your worries.

in South Africa you get your learners permit at 16 and you are legally able to vote, drink and drive at 18...