My cat was really proud of his "catch." He brought a mouse upstairs from the basement, already in a mousetrap!

Comrade 1: "8125 degrees...not great, but not terrible."
Comrade 2: "How high does the temperature gage go?"
Comrade 1: "8125 degrees."

This is how things are now. Stuff that is racist, but is racist going the "right way," gets called non-racist.

I was *RIGHT*!!! When I saw that there were nine comments, I guessed that eight would be from "guest."

So....Ash died and took Pikachu with him?

Semi-monthly means twice a month.

His only friends were some birds, and a person named ROBIN?

"In front of my boys"

A good Wing Man would've gone up with him, and blocked the shot (foul or not, no basket = date).

Can't find a nice lady eagle, but still going through the motions.

I can see men wanting to donate. Luckily, the sperm bank has the solution at hand.

There are a lot of things men don't share with acquaintances and coworkers. They might share those things with friends or someone who has experience that could help, but keep personal details just between true friends who are concerned, and not everybody who is merely curious.

"What did one plane said to the other plane?
Can I crash at your place?"

I checked imdb (from having been tricked a few times by real seeming jokes), and not only is this a real movie, there's a Velocipastor 2.

Non illegitimi carborundum.

Irrumabo circuitu et quæramus.

No question! Some university degrees have no payoff for the time, money and effort put in.

Back when I was deciding what to major in, I had to go to the local public library to look through several-year-old books and year-or-two-old periodicals to see what job prospects were and normal starting and mid-career income levels were for he fields I was considering. Today, current information is available on your phone. So why do so many people fail to look into that? I've seen a few who just majored in what they liked studying, and did not consider how that might enable or affect their eventual careers.

Among several errors that the "Folks" in the post make in using the Catholic Church's ordinances as "Truth," they might also notice that fish is permissible on Fridays during lent, and fish are definitely "alive." The "giving up meat" thing is just a small inconvenience that's meant to remind those following it about the actual sacrifice made on their behalf.

Adam's first job was to name all the animals. Eve came along after that. So, the "two life forms" line doesn't make sense.

The heartbreak should the photo one year be missing one of the other four...

But just one "Anna's?"

Most old time artists didn't know any Middle East people, and figured they looked like the people around them.

Some explorers came back from Africa, and described the Rhino that they saw as a horse with a horn, and artists started painting Unicorns.

Sam and Dean for sure. In addition to great protection from shape-changers/demons/devils/demigods/vampires/pirates/vampirates/etc., I'd like to find out:
-How do you stay so buff subsisting on hamburgers, junk food and beer?
-How do you keep that old Impala running and in pristine condition (and almost always cleaned and waxed)?