plot twist: the chicken thinks it's a mating call

but she swiped right on him too tho

the truman show

Me, in airport security with hundreds of sausage links hidden in my clothes: *starts sweating nervously*

I hate people that can't take jokes. They're so small minded

to me it feels like lava should be earth sauce

"""You miss 100% of the shots you don't take"
-Wayne Gretzky"
-Michael Scott"
-Jeremy"

That would be some extremely translucent skin

Is it wrong that I don't see much change

thin privilege right there

how did he find out tho

or his outfit with his drink

dang he said her eyes looked pretty and she still didn't fuck him. that's cold

ah the big bang theory. Humanity's last bastion of pure, unadulterated comedy.

kind of looks like a tiger