Not gonna lie - I was scrolling slowly and thought that was an ass at first

Okay so I’ve got a story to tell. I was with my first boyfriend (I dumped him soon after this incident - it opened my eyes and I saw what an ass he was) and we were lying in bed naked after just having sex for the first time. It had been both of our first times having sex, so it was quite the experience. I was feeling sore because we didn’t know about lube and I didn’t produce much due to the nervousness that comes with a first time. He had apparently noticed, because he turned to me and - with every ounce of ignorance in his adolescent brain - said, “You know what? I think I liked your hands better than that or your mouth.”
Needless to say, I was speechless.

Wait, I think I’m interpreting this wrong.
Since his sister’s name is Rose because their mother loves roses, that makes me think that the brother’s name is “your mother” because his mother loves herself. Maybe it’s just me but the tone of the joke feels like it’s referring to the narcissistic kind of self-love rather than the healthy kind. So what I hear is basically that his mother is a narcissist. That hardly sounds wholesome to me, which is why I think I’m misinterpreting it. Can anyone explain?

Mah heart

Holy fuck that’s gorgeous. I was expecting some tame vanilla water droplet rainbowy shit but this is epic!

Bloodsicle

r/quityourbullshit

In case you’re still wondering, for most women it’s 4-7 days

Not a bad idea. So basically, a portion the money the robots “earned” while doing their jobs would be redistributed to those who need it?

Why is this so funny

I would love to see this done with total drama characters

You are a brave soul to have liquid and a cat so close to your laptop

Lol everybody’s talking about the buildings and the mountains and what my and I’m just sitting here captivated by how organized that beach looks