I need to find this church. I'd be considered a saint there.

I don't think anyone is going to buy that stool, especially if that is a male dog.

I did this to my sister on her birthday; I would text her "happy birthday" throughout the day just to make the balloons come on the screen.

Now, I've been told to lie to my grandparents about having a boyfriend because he's black, but those messages made me realize that I could have experienced much worse consequences for dating outside my race.

Are you saying that in order to meet David Draiman (of Disturbed), all I need to do is get hospitalized?

I wished this happened. Whenever my boyfriend slept over in my twin bed at my dorm, I never slept well.

Well the concept of having only one soulmate out of at least 7 billion people is absurd. What are the chances of you ever meeting that one person?
I personally believe that we have multiple possible soulmates. No relationship will ever be perfect; people can just simply balance each other out and connect in different ways.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

Donkey looks terrifying.

Ariel: A girl becomes so lust-ridden that she loses her voice in exchange for a vagina.

Although humorous, doing this intentionally more than once is extremely unprofessional. In your career, you need to put your feelings aside in situations like this. How would you feel if someone did this repeatedly to your wedding photos?

I can't handle how cute she is.

The comma is supposed to go before the last quotation mark and it's bothering me.

If someone is ever violent because of a video game, that says so much more about the person than it does about the game.

Shouldn't the title say C instead of D? Unless I'm mistaken, I'm pretty sure the mentioned women don't have dicks but rather have something that begins with C...