I grew these in high school. They were neat. Then another kid crushed them up to pretend it was crystal meth an I punched them in the face.

Who you gonna call?

Deaf people reading subtitles:

Cunningham's Law states "the best way to get the right answer on the internet is not to ask a question; it's to post the wrong answer.".

The shopping cart is the ultimate litmus test for whether a person is capable of self-governing.
To return the shopping cart is an easy, convenient task and one which we all recognize as the correct, appropriate thing to do. To return the shopping cart is objectively right. There are no situations other than dire emergencies in which a person is not able to return their cart. Simultaneously, it is not illegal to abandon your shopping cart. Therefore the shopping cart presents itself as the apex example of whether a person will do what is right without being forced to do it. No one will punish you for not returning the shopping cart, no one will find you or kill you for not returning the shopping cart, you gain nothing by returning the shopping cart. You must return the shopping cart out of the goodness of your own heart. You must return the shopping cart because it is the right thing to do. Because it is correct.

Apparently it was supposed to be an ironic name. They were called "the brotherhood of mutants" and since humans think "mutant=evil" then they must be the "brotherhood of evil mutants".

I did a double take during a psych class when I heard the instrucosay "CBT" and I had an out of body experience thinking we would learn about Cock and Ball Torture as a method of removing trauma.

Stepmom: What are you playing?
Stepson: Skyrim
Stepmom: oh I'll show you how to rim

OZZIE! OZZIE! OZZIE!

Then you find out that both numbers go to the same office.

Why do I keep seeing memes and posts about the "new" ant man movie when it came out in February?

Children can be Classed now?

"No, it's the Marvel fans that have been review bombing."

Straight slang became a gay euphemism.

"If you ask for pictures from different angles I will send you close ups of the dents.

"Perhaps I treated you too harshly."

The shopping cart is the ultimate litmus test for whether a person is capable of self-governing.
To return the shopping cart is an easy, convenient task and one which we all recognize as the correct, appropriate thing to do. To return the shopping cart is objectively right. There are no situations other than dire emergencies in which a person is not able to return their cart. Simultaneously, it is not illegal to abandon your shopping cart. Therefore the shopping cart presents itself as the apex example of whether a person will do what is right without being forced to do it. No one will punish you for not returning the shopping cart, no one will find you or kill you for not returning the shopping cart, you gain nothing by returning the shopping cart. You must return the shopping cart out of the goodness of your own heart. You must return the shopping cart because it is the right thing to do. Because it is correct.
A person who is unable to do this is no better than an animal, an abso

RIP

That whole slope got predicted years ago by Uniquenameosaurus.

"no one gets molested by a gothy teen" - Girl Scout with heart problems

Happened to me today. My bus was 5 minutes EARLY for some reason and left as I came over the hill. I didn't really need to go to that Cass I guess.