Yo I want a wife like this

Well no air resistance would imply that there's no air, so we wouldn't exist anyways

You might as well take it off. No one looks pretty puking amyways

Ahhh if it isn't my old arch nemesis, Doctor Cockface

That's not even that bad of an insult.

Thought it said Rob Paterson for a sec

He is still stuck to this day

The third died from heart disease :(

Her daughter has better pickup lines than me

Absolute zero describes zero chill

Cops: "Are you sure the money wasn't for donuts?? "

A frat boy's wetdream

Haha their ancestors probably depended on rape and arranged marriage

He should have taken his shoes off and gave the man a footshake

This reminds me of that south park episode where stan was grounded so they brought him around on their ipad

*triggered*

Dogs sitting like cows is cooler

Haven't you people ever heard of answering the goddamn door?!
...there's trick or treaters out there