Guess who's sleeping with the lights on tonight?

I hate when this happens. I was playing soccer, and I broke my wrist. I had to finish the rest of the damn game because no one believed me. (we still won the game, so I have a interesting story to tell)

This is why I love hockey.

Proverbs 6:6 "Go to the ant, O sluggard, consider her ways, and be wise."
This guy obviously needs to go spend time with the ants.

If guns are outlawed, you can bet your boots I'm buying a sword. What I'll do with that sword, (other than accidental self disembowelment) will be epic.

THANK YOU! I know way to many people who say they're 'depressed' or have 'anxiety' just because it's fun to say you have issues. It's not, it doesn't make you special, it makes these mental disorders seem less important. And self harm scars are not beautiful. All they really are, something that brought me a moment of relief, and a lifetime of regret and explanations.

"Your time has come, child."

Crack kills

That's cool, not really scary though.

Chewing gum while chopping onions helps you not to cry. (just so you know)

I can't tell if the tittle is supposed to be a gay pun or not, or if it was just understood and I'm an idiot.

Finding Nemo! I was gunna say lion king, but I don't see the first one, only the second.

Must have been a 1D concert somewhere close.

Yes, just fucking yes... This is really cool, excuse me while I go obsessively watch this guys videos for a few hours...

Wouldn't work, all my enemies love JB.

That's what I dislike about some vegans (some, definitely not all). We aren't all obese if we aren't vegan.

My dad's color blind to green and red. I'm terrified when I'm in the car with him.

I had repressed this. I was crying so hard, i think we have it on video.

I'll join, as long as I don't have to make small talk with anyone.

I admit, I read the tittle and expected a dick joke. My innocence is officially gone, replaced by a pervertedness only the internet gives.