That guy must have high medical bills..

Can slide down my throat with little trouble

Goodest boi

People like this make the world so much better

I don't hear complaints from this one

He isn't wrong

Mind if i ask what it is?

You're too slow !

He isn't wrong; I've seen girls mentioning another girl wearing a sweater for the second time in three weeks, like the sweater girl was poor or something. It was a cute sweater.

"You've just won a free cru-"
"MY CALLER ID PREPARED ME FOR THIS"

God bless Pornhub

My mom used to work in childcare; when she's excited she says "potty" and "chu-chu train"

"He commanded them to come outside, and they obeyed without a murmur" Damn..

My cat takes socks but doesn't hoard them, he leaves them around on the floor

The FBI caught the 5 of them smoking an hour later

That pun deserves it's own grave

Benjamin Cockler, yes

When it's that time of the month, 30 seconds apart