Can I help you kidnap him and we share?

What a waste of perfectly fine tea

Tell us the dark joke

He needs the food for the plan

Why is this a thing??

One of my friends from school has cousins in America, so whenever she visits them at Christmas, we break up a few days before them, she likes to go into their school for a couple of days. She told us about this and how she wouldn't do it because she's not American. At the request of me and a couple of other friends, she's considering yelling "God save the Queen" next time

Nat in Civil War

I'm going to have to try the one for stretching clothes, my dad has managed to shrink my favourite pyjamas

I was on study leave for my GCSEs, but now they're done and I don't have to go back into school until September, but my little sister is at school and I was off on her birthday

I don't make fun of people who are learning it as a second of third language. I make fun of people who speak it as their native language and still manage to mess up. Also, my phone autocorrected "third" to "Thor"

If I fits, I sits

Then I must have one of the healthiest brains ever

*sets off asthma*

Is "hounded" really the word we're going for with a cat?

*cough* Clockwork Angel *cough*

Actually England is just England. The United Kingdom is England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland

Thank you for the nightmare material

Boom! No more Chinese laundry