The sun looks so angry

My thinking... If they ducks, they're cool. if they geese, don't trust those bastards and run as fast as you can. Geese attack and bite, it's sore. I'm ask worried that my phone keeps trying to type dicks instead of ducks. My phone knows the truth

Don't trust him, he's a cat

That's the perfect place for mosquitoes. Don't do it if you have a problem with them.

Is it the one with a gap in his tooth?

This would go down very well right now

Why did thrift shop come straight into my head. "Walk up to the club like, what up ....."

I need to use the loo

This cat knows what you did last night

I feared this as a child.I watched a movie, can't remember what it was, and genuinely had a fear of being stuck under this and drowning.

I am tired and I read that as talking to dildos. And now I can't get it out my head. I need sleep

Oscar pistorious...

If I was there, oh my word ...

I laughed a little bit too hard at that than I should have

Been sitting in the airport and grumpy as hell and then this comes on. Absolutely brilliant

I used to sleep walk so bad, my parents found me in the bath screaming "how do I drive this thing" .

You say I love you in Afrikaans by saying. - Jy is n doos

Damn, this is me. Let me go roll in a ball and cry myself to sleep

He doesn't care. He has just took a whole box of painkillers. He is not giving a shit

And I need to go buy a new toothbrush. In this case, sharing is NOT caring

They called vervet monkeys. They super cool until they raid your house.

I live in Durban which is in south Africa. they come in and take fruit, any type of food supplies as well as bathroom supplies apparently. My dogs were clearly sleeping that day

Alice, Alice, who the fuck is Alice

Best tv series ... Weeds. And that line is so true