I played 2 on 2 pong at a bar, best of 7, and we had a crowd develop around us. People were cheering for PONG

Spaghetti, spaghetti, all over the place,
Up to my elbows--up to my face,
Over the carpet and under the chairs,
Into the hammock and wound round the stairs,
Filling the bathtub and covering the desk,
Making the sofa a mad mushy mess.
The party is ruined, I'm terribly worried,
The guests have all left (unless they're all buried).
I told them, "Bring presents." I said, "Throw confettii."
I guess they heard wrong
'Cause they all threw spaghetti!

"Just wait till I tell your father about this"

If Trump becomes president, the Kardashians should make up his cabinet

What makeup? The single red line beneath her lip?

Ah karma, not only for making a douche statement but also for the unnecessarily long hashtag

Shoulda just had jpp for America

Pentium dual cores!?! Do you hate your children?

Hated this orange walnut, like watching jar jar all over again

Mmmm hair bacon

I always thought Homer might be Jesus

Six and one half dozen the other, they burn trash for energy instead of sending it to a landfill

Actually dangerous, wasabi and horseradish are toxic in large quantities

Already broke a billion in 12 days. New record that was previously set by Jurassic World with a simultaneous open in China... Star Wars still hasn't even opened there yet

Someones confusing causation with correlation, it's less because of the books and more that a liberal minded person would read them in the first place

Bullshit, if people didn't cheer or clap you didn't watch the same movie I did

Jinkies

You can't "be" the force

Hands up if you've had to put your contacts back in to find your glasses... more than once