Oh Jose Mourinho, you gotta love how he expresses himself. My favourite expression of his is when he makes this face like his imitating a rocket launch

When I got my college ID card photo, I didn't smile because I thought now I'm out of school, no one has to tell me to smile. I now understand after seeing my photo, why people tell you to smile. My mugshot made me look like a smug psychopath that was pleased with their crime XD

Got some important work related certificates delivered to me the other day and this is exactly how they were delivered to me :/

Skyrim and dishonoured, sounds like a good combo

It looks like that travelling steampunk museum

Finally an issue I can get behind, can we also campaign for legalising marinara?

I thought it was dragonsreach lol

I did this to a guy, it does work. Poor guy was embarrassed though

"Khajjit is clean of skooma! Since the last first seed!"

I can confirm this brutality as a strings player, I used to get callouses on the tip of my fingers from playing for hours long rehearsals and would have to rip them the dead skin off at times since it prevented me from playing in tune

Last year there was a woman who burnt her boyfriends uhh, "sausage" with a hair straightener, I think it was because she thought he was cheating

Every since the global potato crisis, it's worth more than 4 potato my friend!

If you excavate the ground, you'll find a giant stone knee has been punctured by the arrow

First of all, how dare you, second of all HOW DARE YOU ::::: (

A friend of mine was given $10 by an old man at work because he thought that she should buy lunch for herself

Like the one in American beauty? Yeah all the time