All y'all are so sweet. *blush*

Seriously. I loved the detail, it was like a crash course in serial murder, complete with what NOT to do.

Couldn't. They lack the capacity to give any more fucks about the newer phones.

Crash, I think she's pissed that that is the *only* present she got. She wanted that and more. (Think Dudley from Philosopher's Stone. "LAST YEAR I GOT *THIRTY-SEVEN!*")

I was only asking because it appears the joke went right over their head. Jeebus.

Yes. Quite a few of them in fact. They're either in third world countries without the means to do so, asexual without the desire to do so, or very religious without the permission to do so.

Janus: God of Crossroads and Pokémon Trainers

"Why? What's wrong with— HOLY SHIT KILL IT WITH FIRE!"

Well I'm never sleeping again, thanks.

How tall are you, guest?

The captain of my ship asked me if everything was okay when he saw me without a book. This was two days after he'd assumed command. I apparently have a bit of a reputation. *blush*

Probably. He seems really chill for a famous musician.

It's true, the speciesism in Hollywood is just disgusting.

This is a much better dinosaur thing, I agree.

Seriously, then your pizza's ruined.

FUCKFUCKFUCK THAT MEANS THEY'RE EVERYWHERE IT'S THE GODDAMN SILENCE ALL OVER AGAIN.