To be fair, that’s a pretty good metaphor for life too, except you start on thin ice on a warm spring day.

Weren’t they at one point referred to as “the Nanny breed” because most of them were super patient with kids?

I mean that sports are a contest of skill and natural ability, where drugs are considered an alteration of natural ability factors (and also have long-term detrimental health effects). In contrast, the natural ability part of a beauty contest is self-evident, but the “skill” portion of the competition comprises not only clothing and performance but also the application of cosmetics and hair products - which are at least in contemporary times minimally harmful. In other words, the difference is in both social context and safety.

Wood chips aren’t a thing across the pond?

Isn’t the crunching kinda off-putting? Maybe that’s just me, I have huge texture hang ups with food.

Reverse for me. I hate things that make noises in my earholes. I understand it’s opposite for most people.