Actually I don't see the American flag or my bald eagle in a top hat with the Declaration of Independence printed onto it

That looks cool and terrifying at the same time

What type of smoothie was that? Satans super summer strawberry smoothie?

'No..yes yes I'm here. Well I don't see you..oh there you are hi! Hurry the fuck up I've been here for half an hour.'

He's going to bikini bottom

Her face is just like 'this bitch'

It's called a club. Go to one, there's plenty in the cities.

Hardcore

I do that all the time with my friend. I locked myself in her room and didn't leave until after I ate all the candy in her piñata.

This one girl insisted that it didn't rain in Australia and that it fell sideways because gravity pulled the rain to the bottom of the Earth. Forty minutes, three mental breakdowns, and two maps later, I gave up and agreed with her. Lesson learned, arguing with a stupid person is like mud wrestling a greased pig-impossible.

I will pay for this to happen.

She's not wrong

I have two modes, sleep is for the weak and
sleep for a week.

Aargh I've been attacked!

That's the only acceptable thing to do

God has quit on you.

I have manners but if you fuck with me, screw crossing my legs and sitting up straight, I will end you :)

I was about to get pissed

Hi!

If Hitler doesn't rise I'm going to be fuhrerous.

That cat is so fucking fluffy

Self confidence is a wonderful thing