At least she can sit anywhere comfortably

I would've made him go into the endless loop of the "go ask your mother" thing until the guy left

Give the vampire some Sunny D

The neighbor's trying to solve a math problem

*claps offbeat*

Unless you snort it like Becky did

What's that, Fruits? Fruits will make your teeth go grey!

I'm honestly impressed that he made a belt out of nipples.

His knees look like they have faces

Unless the person was in the early days of ingress and placed a bunch of portals into his backyard, all without anyone else reporting those portals, that wouldn't be able to work.

http://tinyurl.com/ztt2vsa

Radda radda?

Now I'm gonna be kept in suspense knowing I'll probably never find out what the other fortune was.

Can they see?

Apparently no one wanted the Under Armour shirts in the back

Jelly was put into a burger in Spongebob and everyone liked it

If you're on Android (I don't know if this works on iOS), You can look up and download an app called OGYouTube. It lets you play audio in the background, have an adjustable screen outside of the app, and download the video.