My girlfriend started smoking last night so I slowed down and used lubricant

Its not really a pun but more of a general joke. What does a man have that hangs at his thigh and goes into holes its gone into a million times? A key. Or something akin to that.

They burn more rubber than a race car
She’s taken more loads than a washing machine
She can go fuck herself, everybody else has

Yesterday I was trying a C4. I don't think it went so good. Cause I blew it.