pokethebear · 18 weeks ago
Made a mess of our family and changed our long term plans and how we live.
riyriamistborn · 18 weeks ago
My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer three weeks ago, and it's definitely hit me harder than it is her. She's handling it a lot better than I am.
vodka · 18 weeks ago
I don't know half of my aunts and uncles because of cancer and have lost every bit of sympathy I had left for my mother. So I would say cancer has driven my family even more apart than we allready were
dimebag · 18 weeks ago
My grandpa died of cancer 8 years ago and it hit everyone hard. I was too young at the time to really see how it affected my family, but him passing was still the saddest I've ever been.
pitty · 18 weeks ago
My grandma had it twice and it's genetic. She's alive but I'm sure that either me or one of my sisters will develop it. It would destroy our family.
sunflowers · 18 weeks ago
Yep. Lost 3 out of 4 grandparents to it, and the last one is still alive, but barely. He's depressed and old. He doesn't want to live anymore. My mom had it, too. Horrible. It just takes everything you have from you and doesnt stop. I was a kid, too. It is the most helpless feeling possible, knowing that the life of those you love is in the hands of a God you are hesitant to believe in.
laughwendylaugh · 17 weeks ago
My Mum had it and it bothered her more than it did my sisters and I. Admittedly, she is from the generation where if you had cancer you died. My sisters and I are from the generation where you wait and see what type you have and what stage you're in before deciding if you're likely to die or not. She was stage 0-1.
guest_ · 17 weeks ago
Cancer sucks. If a person lives long enough, they will get cancer. Cancer effects families in different ways just as it does people. Fear, grief, anger, despair are all common. Confusion, unease, not knowing how to treat a person, what to say or think or feel. They may beat it, or their loved ones might watch them slowly waste away. There is often a cycle of guilt and stress. The grieving and fear for someone who is still alive, the costs of treatment or hospice, having to think or plan for the reality of no longer having their income or having to support them. There is a practical side to cancer that thinking about makes many people feel terrible- materialistic, but they know that wether the patient makes it or not, Survivors lives go on, and life for everyone will change after. There’s no “normal” with cancer, just people tryin to deal with a terrible thing as best they can. It’s a good time for anyone concerned to be surrounded by friends and family, and to take it a day at a time.
mikerotch · 17 weeks ago
I lost one of best mates and cousin earlier this year. He was in his 30s. It is hard. We used to say we hated using the terminology that described cancer as a battle because then the inference is there are "winners and losers". There isn't either in cancer. But we have been fortunate in that it brought our entire family closer, he taught us that family is the most important. But in the thick of it and even after I think unconsciously him and everyone around him chose to celebrate his life and celebrate what we did have with him rather than lament the loss. It made a huge difference in the mindset when he did pass. I miss him. Everyday. But I smile when I think of him and am so thankful for what I did get.
Cancer sucks. It freaking sucks. But we cannot change the course it may take by rejecting our family and being bitter about the illness. If it is something you're going through or someone you know, do everything you can to support and celebrate what you have/had now.
blankcanvas · 17 weeks ago
thank you all for the responses, my mother died earlier in june due to cancer
laughwendylaugh · 17 weeks ago
I'm so sorry for your loss (((hugs)))
guest_ · 17 weeks ago
I’m sorry to hear that @blankcanvas. No meager words could ease the grief of the passing of one so loved. I can only hope that she went out in the best corcumstances possible given the situation, and that you and your loved ones can regret nothing in her last times save for her passing. May her cherished memories live on, and may she and all your loved ones receive the full blessings of whatever powers you believe in, or to say at least in time some peace. My wishes that you are surrounded by positive people warmed by the good memories that shut out the cold sorrows of loss. She lives on through love, her fight is done and there is no more pain for her, and she wouldn’t want to pass that pain to the living I am sure. Live your best life, be well. Celebrate her through your hapiness everyday. Condolences to you.
mikerotch · 17 weeks ago
I'm so sorry blankcanvas. No words can soften a loss like that. Just, when you do think of her, think of the best moments and celebrate her life and what you did have.
blankcanvas · 17 weeks ago
thank you @guest_ and @mikerotch really does mean a lot.
funkmasterrex · 16 weeks ago
Cancer is awful, but it's not the worst way to go. How it affects families depends on each individual... so I can't answer that.