When that happens, make plans to change the world

What do you mean?

I've been there. Time for a change of scenery. That's how i solve it.

start an army and conquer the planet. No one will every be able to say you aren't succeeding when you are king of the earth

Im sure there'd be plenty of people who'd take issue with that and say otherwise lol but i appreciate the sentiments

I'm feeling like that regarding my grades. except my parents are directly applying pressure

Here's a bit of background of how I've come to this situation i guess... From middle school though high school I'd go to school, monday through friday, then i'd go work with my grandfather until 7 of a night. I did that for roughly 6 years. When i graduated high school i immediately got a job at pizza hut delivering pizzas. I worked monday though friday closing, roughly 5 hours a night if not more, the next week i started welding school and attended morning classes. 5 hours of classes then 2 hours between the end of class and work. I did that for 6 months before i got a full time job. Then it was 10 hours of work before 5 hours of class at night. I did that for another 4 months. When i graduated school i then started working 12 hour shifts, minimum 5 hours on saturdays, for about a year. For a short time i was off overtime before i started traveling, which was 55 hours a week minimum. Well now i'm home pending more road work working 40's mondays through Thursday. I've got 3 days off

And it's honestly the first time since i was like 13 I've had time to myself and it's such a weird concept...

Tl;dr
Im not used to having any free time to myself and now I've got free time and it's lead me to start recording upon myself and everything else quiet a bit...

You're definitely not alone. A little bit of internal pressure is good, if you use it to motivate yourself to keep getting better. It's easy to feel like expectations, even unspoken ones, are weighing on us. It's super common to assume that not making progress is as bad as failing, but it's not. You just gotta get comfortable with where you are, take happiness wherever you find it, and remember that you feel the biggest expectations from yourself - meaning you can keep them in check.

I know what you mean. All your life you have had some sort of purpose and now you have time for your own and have no idea how to spend it. I now have a week of on one of my jobs which means this week I'm only working weekends and I have zero idea what to do. I've been juggling 48+ hours of work with an 8-10 hour worknight on saturday and taking care of my horses and dogs. And before my fulltime job I was away from home 12 hours for school and had a weekend job for 20 hours. And eventhough I'm working quite hard I don't get anything done in my life. I can't enjoy my free time because I want to do something with my life I can't. It's a feeling of being stuck in a life you don't live yourself but just move around in.

Hit the nail on the head mate

So, you're at a weird point in life where you've done all things you're supposed to: you finished school and found a trade and gotten good at that. You've walked all the paths that other people set up for you. Now it's time to do your own thing. What gives you a sense of purpose and fulfillment beyond your work? I have a little set of things that make me happy: I volunteer at the local animal shelter because I love reassuring scared little pups and kitties. Also, I got a smoker and now I'm good at smoking different stuff - salmon, cheese, meatballs, whatever - because I love sharing that with people. I've thought I might start an army and conquer the planet because I just read that somewhere and it seems pretty solid.
,
The things I do give me a sense of fulfillment because I am helping others in random ways. I think this frustrating pressure you feel is this last stage of growing up that no one tells you how to achieve - becoming "self-actualized."

Like I said, you could start by thinking of something that makes you feel happy/fulfilled. Then figure out how to share it with others. It will be another thing in your life that takes up your time but it will be something to build and work toward that gives you more meaning. Does that make sense? I think that humans are wired to figure themselves out for a while and then shift that energy from being self-centered to being something-else-centered. I think that’s what is bothering you. You’re outgrowing the “shell” of an ideal life that got set up for you and you are ready to graduate to something bigger.

@vodka beat me to it- but yeah man, it’s normal. When you’re used to working to the bone 24/7 or grinding just to get by and suddenly things are good- it’s a shock. It’s like you spend all this time preparing to succeed, but nothing prepares you for how to actually deal with it when you do. If you aren’t from an “in the club” background and you make it in- you’re left with an anxiety. You know what you did and who you are and that you earned what you have- but at the same time you feel like you don’t belong there and that someone is going to figure that out. It’s like your awake and dreaming. All the free time is overwhelming. Eventually you adjust and feel like there isn’t enough, especially if you start to fill it with hobbies and passions. But that’s just my trick. To remember why I put it all the time and all the dreams of doing more than just surviving and to pay that past me back for the work by doing what past me was wishing they could do. I take a little time to relax now...

... and then to not get burnt out, and I do projects that I love and sharpen other skills (and sometimes put some money in my pockets,) I take classes or read up because getting to a good place is awesome but keeping ahead is work too, but now I have the luxury that I can take a class a couple days a week or month as it fits my schedule and not cram multiple jobs and studying and everything else 60 hours of work in a 24 hour day. Some people need to be busy most of the time, my key is to use the luxuries I have so that I’m busy in a way that challenges and entertains me because I want to be busy as opposed to being busy in a way that kills me slowly because I have no choice. Find your balance, find what you love. Use your time to build something for yourself. You won’t feel so lost and you’ll get something to enjoy and that will help you move forward to your next steps in life. But every once in awhile think back to the grind and those days you’d kill to sleep in or just play a game...

... or work on your stuff or watch a movie. Andgive ypurself that because you earned it and you can. Good luck metalman. You’ve made it this far, the next challenge is learning to enjoy what you’ve worked for, and as far as challenges go, it’s one of life’s better ones.