I don't feel okay coming out to certain people? Like my parents and family? More details in comments.
by daddyken · 4 comments 1 week ago
daddyken · 1 week ago
So, I'm bisexual. I came to terms with it about two months ago. Before then, I was struggling with figuring out my sexuality because I began to realize I am attracted to both men and women. I only came out to a select few of people when I was still figuring things out, but since I have come to terms with it, I have come out to a total of 7 trusted friends. Here's the thing, I don't feel uncomfortable coming out to my peers and others my own age. I don't necessarily am to the point of just announcing it to everyone, but it has come up in conversations with friends and I've come out by just saying "Oh, I'm bi, by the way." However, this is still really personal to me and I feel guilty not coming out to family and my parents before coming out to other peers and friends that I am not as close with. I almost want to come out to my parents, but I'm not ready and I am unsure of their reactions.
daddyken · 1 week ago
I also don't think I will have the power to choose when and how I come out to other family if my parents know because that shit spreads like wildfire. But I trust and love my parents and I guess I just feel bad keeping this from them when I feel okay coming out to other people. I am also afraid that if I tell too many of my friends/peers, it will accidentally slip or it will somehow get back to my parents from someone else and this is something they need to hear from me.
poisin_kat · 1 week ago
My main suggestion is to not wait too long if you're certain. I've been waiting for years because I just never had the confidence and that fear, even if your family is accepting, stacks with that feeling of waiting too long more and more. Good luck dude
unicycle · 1 week ago
What people don't tell you is that it's not just one grand event and then you're out to everyone - you're gonna be constantly coming out to people for the rest of your life. For everyone you meet you'll have to decide if you're comfortable coming out and if so, when and how. So with that in mind, don't stress it too much. If you're uncomfortable telling your parents now, don't. You never have to tell anyone. You can wait a few months to see if you get more comfortable. Personally, I never outright told my parents and it's been 15+ years. I never hid anything from them, but I never felt it was necessary to come out. So do whatever you need to feel comfortable and safe.