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Libre express ftw (although it has some of the same problems, but hey it's free)
Or Google docs (I use that on my tablet)
Also the stock market joke is especially fitting now, damn

Very sensitive

"someone get me a fucking chicken"

12/10 good girl

No chance for Islam in the civilized world, judeo-christianity dragged civilization forward and it’s morality will continue.

In the pic, where it says 'officially more successful than the USSR' ...
Perhaps, but again, it's still on Other People's Money (their "allowance").

Careful. They reproduce at an alarming rate

The witcher ?

1. Stupid Facebook post
2. Either the parrot would die, or he has the smallest chode known to man.

I love my family, I don’t mind providing for them. I work 90 hours/week, my wife works 35 hours/week, my children are lazy toddlers and are not employed.
We pool our resources and everyone gets what they need plus a few wants; I reward myself with firearms, tattoos, motorcycles, wants that cost tens of thousands. My wife takes care of her own wants but I give her luxury things and experiences, thousands annually. My children’s wants are covered by a few hundred maybe a couple thousand dollars.
Even in this scenario, where I love the people who I commune with, if we split evenly our resources and my toddler received $30,000 for wants while I spent my time continuing to earn eventually I would stop working so hard and my toddler would never grow up without any incentive to.
Communism doesn’t even work in a family setting where you love and want to support everyone let alone relying on the generosity of strangers in a ruling class thousands of miles away.

Die in a fire

Ah-ha; a real Festuvis!!

Use MS Publisher. Much better than Word for that type of stuff

Why is there an asterisk for the word heck?

As well he should...

Anger is fear worn on the outside.

Select image, right click, wrap text, and select for the image to be in front of the text. Then just edit for paragraphs accordingly. Has helped me loads of time at work, hope it can assist too :)

Exactly that's the only time he pops into the scene . . . Useless singer

couple goals

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You get more than stoned, you get bouldered

...among other things.

The entire series is on Hulu.

I’m with you. We just got a kitten and I tried to name her Zena. My daughter was like, “Why?”.

Taming raptors is quite easy tbh... wyverns however cannot be tamed and must be milk raised! Gosh!

Not only are cats destroying the bird population but they carry a parasite that affects one in four people in western countries. They carry worms and fleas too so I hope she’s not going to use those dishes for any guests, aaand I hope it is spayed

Cats are destroying the bird population

...this is Americs ?

Too soon bro

Meanwhile fuzzy as shit America’s most wanted

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow....

Won’t take your word for it- demands to see manager

But what if we don't have anyone

That's not many students attending

When people can criticize but they cannot take any criticism themselves.

And that, my friend, is called Karma

You realize this is a pentagram not a demonic symbol come on guys do some research beforehand.... she just wants to protect herself from demons

I'm still at the stage of life when I'm happy to get it tbh.

@hyperion. Bubba/Bubbaet thank you for them very strong words of encouragement and love. This really hits hard even on a hardass like me. I hope you and your family have an AWESOME XMAS & NEW YEAR!!