Try Garfield Minus Garfield. It's really weird.

Because if you meet enough people (read: if you work in service) hatred becomes the default setting and coffee just tastes vile. No need to bring even more bitterness into my life.

Chindonesian?

For a moment you really had given me hope that this whole idiocy had ended for good.

The best warning sign I've ever seen was outside the laser lab at our university: Please refrain from looking directly into the laser with your remaining eye.

I was worried about the temperature for a second but then I remembered retard units exist.

If the survival of our species depended on women making the first move, we would have gone extinct a long time ago.

Must be a BMW.

Matriarch, existence had only started
Verily, I have gone and cast it all asunder.

That's not a pure-blood Oompa Loompa more like the love child of Angela Merkel and an Oompa Loompa.

This has got to be the best description of project managers of all time.

Thanks for reminding me, now I have to play it again. -_-

Doubt. His eldest child was born in 1843. To fit eleven generations into that timespan you'd have to have a hell of a lot of teenage pregnancies.

Being unable to correctly pronounce a German <ch>... always funny. Now if it read Jesus sucKt dicK I could see the joke. But the way it is written here you're either bragging about your inability to read correctly or your inability to speak German.

"The solution for pollution is dilution" really was the slogan for this shit. That is the reason I don't trust humans with nuclear power, simply because of people.

And I wouldn't want to be with someone who pretends to understand NGE. I'm convinced that nobody understands NGE despite what they keep telling you. My guess is that maybe one person on this planet understands it and that person is Hideaki Anno and even of that I'm not too sure.

American dads only. As a European, I know Makita and have seen Dewalt on the internet. Never even heard of the other two.

The nerve of some people. How dare they call someone when the issue could be resolved just as quickly by sending dozens of e-mails back and forth.

But why, oh why were those cuts necessary you ask? Could it be tax breaks for the filthy rich? Nah, surely, that's not it.

1979 wasn't 42 years ago. Are you using the internet explorer?

*you're

I don't get it. You don't want to change yourself in order to comply with the standards of someone else? Great, good for you. But why cry foul play when the other side also insists on their standards instead of moving on to someone compatible? Sounds pretty hypocritical to me.

But he isn't always in space. Sometimes he involuntarily goes on adventures with his friends, a hyperactive sheep and a know-it-all shrubbery. But usually he just wants to be left alone and do fun and exciting stuff like visiting the museum of ingrain wallpaper (yes, there is an episode about that). Bernd is great.

Some people are obviously mentally challenged. I mean, as if the eyebrows weren't a dead giveaway. Or did those people think she were a natural blonde and decided to dye just her eyebrows.