Don't have to imagine. I was in the Army and in basic training people introduced me to a whole new level of stupidity. Seriously, I always thought that level was limited to comic's and cartoons but no, apparently some people just have to prove anything is possible.
During, Ramagan (that's grenade training) we're all lined up waiting for our chance to use live grenades. It was almost my chance to go and all of us, besides one Drill Sargent and whoever's turn it is to actually throw their grenades, are waiting inside a bunker. Standing waiting for the Drill Sargent to call next I hear this conversation.
Drill Sargent (DS): Here, these are your live grenade. Keep them in your hands with your fist closed. When it's your turn you will run out to the DS and they will tell you exactly what you're to do. Do you understand?
Private: Yes DS!
(maybe 10 seconds pass)
DS: WHAT THE BEEP PRIVATE? WHERE THE BEEP ARE YOUR BEEPING PINS?
Private: I took them out so I'd be ready to throw my grenades DS.
DS: HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND. DON'T MOVE. DON'T EVEN BREATHE PRIVATE. SARGENT THE MORON PULLED HIS BLEEPING PINS OUT.
Sargent: WTF?
DS: Can you see them? they have to right here?
Sargent: Yeah I got them. Keep his fists closed tight and I'll get them back in.
Meanwhile the other DSs are herding us into the wall around a corner. That was our one and only failure for Ramagan. And no the private did not get a chance to throw live grenades. In fact I only saw him once more before he was sent home.
Of course that's not to say that's my only story out a basic but it is the one that could have killed the most. There were other things that happened on the various ranges that really make me question how some people pass the test's to even get in the Army or why the recruiter didn't just say "sorry your to much of an imbecile" and send them on their way.
When I was at basic training we had one pvt that was a recycle from another platoon. She was absolutely terrible. Of course, I got paired with her fml. She refused to run, was a constant pain in the a$$, lazy, complained about everything, just not soldier mentality at all.
Anyway, she's the reason we had our razors taken away. We couldn't shave our legs or pits for a month because she got put on a psych hold and eventually sent home.
*grabs popcorn*
Drill Sargent (DS): Here, these are your live grenade. Keep them in your hands with your fist closed. When it's your turn you will run out to the DS and they will tell you exactly what you're to do. Do you understand?
Private: Yes DS!
(maybe 10 seconds pass)
DS: WHAT THE BEEP PRIVATE? WHERE THE BEEP ARE YOUR BEEPING PINS?
Private: I took them out so I'd be ready to throw my grenades DS.
DS: HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND. DON'T MOVE. DON'T EVEN BREATHE PRIVATE. SARGENT THE MORON PULLED HIS BLEEPING PINS OUT.
Sargent: WTF?
DS: Can you see them? they have to right here?
Sargent: Yeah I got them. Keep his fists closed tight and I'll get them back in.
Of course that's not to say that's my only story out a basic but it is the one that could have killed the most. There were other things that happened on the various ranges that really make me question how some people pass the test's to even get in the Army or why the recruiter didn't just say "sorry your to much of an imbecile" and send them on their way.
*grabs more popcorn and a soda*
Anyway, she's the reason we had our razors taken away. We couldn't shave our legs or pits for a month because she got put on a psych hold and eventually sent home.
I know that song
I love that song
That song