I'm almost afraid of how they are going to make Shazam! dark and gritty.

But thats what they are using as an excuse not to have any humor in the new movies. Because of course there is no middle ground between goofball hijinx and bleak dispair.

I'm mailing myself to DC in order to punch them in the face

Yay, have Bucky video it

No, that's a bad idea. A Green Lantern movie will never be enough. We need a GL tv show. There'll be enough episodes to cover the vast canon of GL, and TV shows are allowed to be weird. Just look at Doctor Who!