I really do

Just the way I like it!
I hope you're not claustrophobic
*presses up against you*

Nah, it's ok
*squishes you*

Is that a test tube in your pocket or are you happy to see me?

Nope, it's a test tube! It's got a harmful virus in it that could wipe out mankind!

Now I'm kind of tempted to break it
But I would die as well

Yeah, and that wouldn't be good now would it?

I guess not!
So take it out of your pocket and let's cuddle
Do you want some pizza?

Sure! I'd love pizza

*hands you pizza*
Do you like it?
Does it have a weird taste?

Tastes like chicken. Is this KFC pizza?

Nope, I made it myself using a secret ingredient

Oooooooo, what's the secret ingredient?

Friendship (jk)
It wouldn't be a secret if I told you
Unless you are willing to trade something for it

*Hands you virus*
Want this?

I guess that'll do
*takes test tube*
So there was unicorn milk in the dough

Oh no, I'm allergic to unicorn milk!

What? Are you alright? Can you breathe?

Yeah I'm fine. I was just joking

I was really eager to try mouth-to-mouth, but I'm glad you're ok

I mean, we can still try it

Yay!
*pretends to know CPR but actually kisses you on the lips*

Sounds good to me
*returns*

*squeezes you*
So how have you been?