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What a guy!

Yes. His name is Dr. Insidious

His trainer was named Dr. Ew. What a weird sounding name

You trained him!? That explains a lot. Your name or his‘?

His. He was awful fond of it too

That‘s because he charms you while slowly killing you

That must've been it!

He is very friendly tho

very true

He can steal your gf. Be careful, dr

hell nah he ain't

Heard he already has her number

That's just a rumour

Possibly, but Dr. Insidious always finds a way

And Dr. Ew always finds his victory

Let‘s see if you win this time

99.94% sure I will

He‘s 99.95% sure he‘ll win

More like -99.95% amirite?
*hi fives myself*

Lol.
You should feel threatened by him, dr

I am threatened by no one

Dr Insidious: *talking to dr‘s gf* “Hey, girl. Are you French because Eiffel for you. You look like you need a man...a real man. So what do you say?“

*le gf* "Richard's pick up lines are way better than yours"

D.I: “Well, Richard‘s a d**k“

*le gf* "yeah, hes my dick."
"....that came out wrong"

D.I: “I‘m a better d than him. That also came out wrong“

*le gf* "he also HAS a better D so shut up"

D.I: “You haven‘t even seen it, pervert“

*le gf* "Richard sent me a photo of yours. It's very small"

D.I: “He hasn‘t seen it either. He must have sent his‘ to you unedited“

*walks up and pulls your pants off to prove that it's the same penis*
Ta daaa

D.I: “Hello, 911. I‘ve been assaulted. Help!“

I already destroyed 911

“I‘ll the take the law into my hands then“

Omae wa shinderu

“NANI!?!?“

*murders insidious and scatters his pieces across disneyland*

*regenerates. Kidnaps dr‘s gf and leaves the country*

Aha! You kidnapped the decoy girlfriend I left for you to kidnap! The real darling is hidden...

“I knew you would do that and swapped them. It‘s you that has the decoy!“

Aha! I knew you would do that! I am your mentor, I know how you work, so I made a decoy of the decoy! You just gave me a decoy, and the real one is safe and sound!

“I fooled you double. I decoyed your gf and made more decoys and took her before you even noticed. We‘re getting married next month“

Ha ha! But you see, you have been triple fooled, because my girlfriend DOESNT EXIST! I just made you run around for no reason

“So you‘re lonely and sad? Ha! That‘s the best revenge!“

I'm not lonely and sad, I'm a totally happy person being with myself!

D.I: “The first stage is denial, dr“

Just like you denying the fact that you lost already

D.I: “That‘s the second stage; anger“

No, its true; Your entire reality exists within a simulation I created. It also includes the most advanced AI ever known to man-- YOU!

D.I: Stage 3; bargaining

How tf is that bargaining

D.I: “Stage 4; depression. lol“

you're makin shit up

D.I: “You were about to reach the last stage of grief(acceptance). I guess you‘re back to stage 1-denial“

You're impossible

“That‘s my middle name“

Neato

D.I: “Beautiful. The final stage; acceptance“

Wtf am I even accepting

“If you were wise enough, you‘d know“

But you're going on way different tangents

“Explain“

We were talking about your middle name and you went back to the 5 stages of death or whatever

D.I: “Grief, dr, grief!! It‘s fun annoying you“

Why though, we used to be the best of friends

D.I: “We still are. It‘s to feel in the gap of you being single, dr. Oh, you poor thing“

To feel in the gap?

“What‘re you trying to say?“

You made a typo

“FILL! DAMMIT lol. That just sounded weird.“

Yes it did

“And you must be proud of it“

Kinda?

“I‘m borrowing your chainsaw for...purposes“

Have fun

D.I: “I‘m taking your sister too“

Go on ahead, she needs to get together with someone IMO, I'm literally the only one in my family who's in a relationship rn

Wait, even if D.I. had AIDS?

Her issue, not mine

That‘s heartless even for you, dr

Her sexcapades are not my business. Shes told me that before

Aww, sibling love
Doesn‘t sound like you both are close

We are, but we keep those issues to ourselves

I get why

It's just how we roll

D.I: “On second thought. I‘ll take something more precious“

How about we just stop having this conversation and come back some other time

Fair enough {^.^}