Imagine going on a leisurely stroll thru the swamp and tripping over this mossy log

First, it's unlikely you'll be tripping of this "log". They tend to move when any large predator approaches, and yes, you are a predator. Second, assuming you do somehow manage to sneak up on one and then succeed in tripping over it you can expect one of two reactions. One, it's going to hiss, slap his tail or present it's open mouth to you, to ward you off, before running away. Or it's going to attempt to attack you. It all just depends on whether it thinks it can eat you or you can eat it.

I just hope I’m wearing brown pants so they don’t stain

I am already panicking looking at this picture