What would you do?

I would make a fist, put it in the air, shake it and yell "I KNOW!"

thiS IS HITCHIKERS GUIDE TO THE GALAXY that you ripped off!

Kind of a ripoff of Bowerick Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged in Hitchhiker's Guide.

No no no. The alien has got to say "I've traveled millennia from my home planet to yours, to tell you that you, my friend, are an idiot"

I would start rolling on the ground eating my slippers

Bunny slippers