I’d no certified art critic but that portrait looks like crap.

Christmas memes posted before Halloween make baby Jesus cry. He gets cranky and moisty-eyed for anything before Thanksgiving, JSYK.

Because they know that people who work in low pay - and presumably low-skilled - jobs probably ‘need’ the work, are easily replaceable, and will put up with it. Companies extort services for minimal pay since they know there are twenty Tom, Dick, and Harrys (o Tomás, Ricardo, y Geraldos) who would be happy to take the job if it opened up. Pay people at least something close to a living wage, increase the price of goods to support a meaningful percentage of their compensation, take the hit in your profits, and provide the citizenry with reasonably affordable skills training and education so that they don’t have to work three or four low-paying jobs to make ends meet. Western and Northern Europe seem pretty competent at these sorts of things. Beg, borrow, steal for ideas on how to make it work.

Nailed it.

Well then, give me some peanuts and hide the epi pen, honey, because I have a surprise for you.

Judas is that one lurky dude at the club who thinks that just because he has 40 pieces of silver that he’s entitled to be kissing on you like that.

I think baptism just got a lot more interesting.

He’s from Arkansas. He’s grinning because he thought he found a week’s supply of crystal meth. *high fives Texas, Oklahoma, Missouri, Tennessee, Mississippi, and Louisiana*

Looks like he’s more related to me than his canine companions. Selective breeding done right.

On a related note, check out the new Duck Tales. It’s pretty epic.

Just learned that pufferfish inflate by ingesting water, not by gulping air. But this Gaara-like ‘ultimate defense’ tires them out and puts them at risk for later being eaten: ‘Pufferfish, also known as blowfish, can quickly expand by gulping water into their elastic stomachs. In the movie "Finding Nemo," the pufferfish Bloat inflates in an instant and awkwardly floats away like a beach ball, but it turns out that the fishes' puff has nothing to do with holding in air [...] But inflation comes at a cost, and can increase the fish's oxygen uptake to five times that of resting levels [...] It then takes an average of 5.6 hours before the fish can return to typical metabolic levels. A tired fish is a vulnerable one, and it's likely that pufferfish — known for their deadly poison — may be easier targets for predators after they deflate.’: (https://www.livescience.com/49010-pufferfish-breathe-during-inflation.html)

When I first scrolled down, I got my hopes up for a split second that this would be a new Dark Garfield meme. On second thought, I guess it kind of is.

Absolutely correct. You humans have no idea how much your howls wouldn’t turn a chair on ‘The Voice’.

I never thought I’d turn to a domesticated animal to get fresh ideas for my next IG post.

Russia’s Favorite Side Hoe
Canadians Hate Them, Apologetically
Mexicans Usurping Former Mexico
China Copies, Scores Higher
Walmart Scooters Outsell Bikes
Bullet Proof Kids’ Backpacks
And Who Invented iPhones?
Try _Not_ Using Amazon
In N Out, Bitches

Your dad has more upper lip than Donatella Versace.