Wait. You get phone calls? Like, actual phone calls in real life? So, how do I buy one of these functionally superior smartphones with Chinese spyware built in so I can finally have a real verbal conversation with someone other than my mother?

@mialinay You read ‘Y R U N IT’ wrong. *wink*

@bethorien 0:22-0:37. Shockingly, it appears that they do. (https://youtu.be/ZnYNmGMsU18)

I think it’s said ‘shew-OW’. And had I known reckless pyromania was what makes a man sexy nowadays, I’d have learned Portuguese and bought a lifetime supply of matches eons ago.

Whew! I have my fingers crossed that the ‘three dynasties over 1,000 years’, ‘varying quality’ and ‘foreigners climbing all over it’ parts prove inaccurate, too. Otherwise, it’d be pretty hard to justify the cost!

Huh. Never would have guessed ‘cownivores’ ate meat due to mineral deficiency. Apparently, ‘A huge range of herbivores, including deer, camels, giraffes, pigs, cows and sheep, are known from time-to-time to eat other animals [...] The cow’s behaviour might be motivated by a mineral deficiency... But [...] bird-eating in bovids and deer may actually just be a fairly normal bit of behaviour that we’re only beginning to document. (https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/when-herbivores-arent-poor-chicken-got-eaten-cow-180951115/)

Meh. It’s FunSubstance. I stopped questioning these things a long time ago, LOL. Stay awesome, awesome lady.

@xvarnah You should try one out. I hear they’re super effective at helping women understand a man’s perspective in relationship situations. Added side benefit - your hair and wardrobe will always be on point**.
**Only available with select models.

They won’t know whether to watch you or the screen. I hope you have a great time!

*taps Block This Caller*

May your memories of that cat today give you the sweetest of dreams tonight.

Bring it, mate. I’m sure we won’t be disappointed.

Depends on who you ask! So, I have to give you a huge round of applause. Whether FS realized it or not, you not only did DDoC for all of October but you also posted not 1, not 2, but darn near 5 photos per day. I was a jerk when I called you out for posting too many moth memes and taking back thinking that you should become the next DDoC. That was rude. But you blew my comments out of the water with your absolutely *relentless* posts last month. On 26 October, I started to think, ‘Holy cow. He’s going to do it. He’s actually. Going. To do it.’ And you did. So, bravo to you, my friend. You effing nailed it.