Oh NOW I see the problem... YOU failed to note that my comment began with "In Soviet Russia..." please research this as it is a commonly accepted and popular "opening line" for a "joke" (statement made in a satirical or parodical manner as to promote the idea of the teller as 'funny')

Wow Guest, you had a LOT to say. TLDR, but I can make it all condensed into one simple statement: "no bullying is allowed, but nothing the victims do will be punished and nothing short of unconsciousness or death goes on anyone's permanent record."
Bullies make use of the fact that the system, protects THEM. Rule followers are afraid of consequences, bullies are rule breakers, so they get by on being risk adverse. Most of my old bullies are business people, parents, former HS state champs (big surprise). They learned that doing what you want, even illegal, is acceptable if you dont get caught or society let's you slide on it.
So I say, if a kid is being bullied at school, and the school is blind to it, they should be blind to what the victim does to retaliate. THEN, the bullie learns consequences, and the victim learns closure. The world wins.

Ah, Mr. Whiskers, we shall be great foes, or online battle (of wits) shall be of legend.

It's like a regular relationship but with more steps.

Clearly a few weeks of bully not being able to bash him or others and a lifelong reminder of "bitches get stitches" AND "stop hitting yourself". Belive someone who was chosen by his bullies to be the one they tried to crucify in 5th grade to see if it would hurt (catholic grade school); and with 3 nails through my left hand their parents saying "they were just playing". No charges ever filed and neither my parents, the nuns, or school did anything.

Perhaps so, but in Soviet Russia, beautiful women are police and soldiers rather than ankle and butt models, fin dommes, Twitter hoes, and you tube bloggers because THEY are actually serving society with something useful. Blyat, is it the cold, something in the trees? Radiation from numerous concealed nuclear disasters? I want those spicy particles.

COVER HER WITH THE BLANKEY AND CUDDLE HER YOU DOLT!

Thong...